I'm More Experienced in Life?

The other night I was talking to my friend about who was more "experienced", and no, we were not talking about sexually, haha! When I was discussing how I am more "experienced", I realized that I have really went through some rough shit. Was I really trying to prove I was more experienced because of all the bad shit that has happened during my life, or was it my brain trying to make me realize, "hey girl, you are making it and you should realize it". Weirdly enough, my brain was right. I may not have been as fortunate as others, but who I am now is someone I am proud to be. I am really making it. I am in college to further my education and so that I can transfer into a program I am really interested in.-to me, that's a start.

I was debating on actually posting the types of questions that were brought up by myself that led me to think "I am more experienced in life", and I think I will. They may seem like nonsense, but they aren't..in a way. I'm just throwing them out there, so you all can get an idea.

"Ever have an immediate family member go to jail or prison?" 

"Ever have to live with a guardian, or away from your parents for more than 5 years?" 

"Ever skip classes or drop out?"

"Ever want to be put in the hospital just to see who really cares?"

"Ever been emotionally abused?"

"Ever witness someone so high, that they couldn't even paint your toenails?"

"Ever have to act like an adult for an adult?"

"Any family members who have had cancer or currently have cancer?"

I'm not sure what you make of the questions I asked to see if this person really knew anything about what someone goes through, but the fact that they all are apart of my life, even if some of it is in the past, is interesting. Why did I even let all of that out? Why bother? Well, I am guessing it's good to let some things out, even if they aren't good things. Everything that may have been unfortunate in my life, may have affected me, but I am a pretty positive person, and I love that about myself.

After everything, and at the end of the day, I like who I am and I love myself. That is the most important thing to do for yourself.

Love yourself, and don't let your past affect your future in a negative way. 

Almost September!

Hai everyone! I know my last entry was alot of things, and things I need to explain now since a month has passed on. To let everyone know how everything ACTUALLY did turn out.

I got my GED! Yes, I now have a diploma and no longer am I considered a drop out! I did what I had to do. I am so glad that I am finally done with it, sadly ima miss the two great teachers that were there for me in the class, the were really awesome and very helpful! Suprisingly, my highest score was in math, i'm not telling my scores haha. I'm the girl who has a diploma now.

My future..may be right around the corner, but it feels as if it is miles away. Things seem to be back firing here and there, and kinda mess things up. Future why must you do this to me!!?!

No I do not... have my license yet OR a car. I haven't practiced driving in a month! So no use in worrieing about getting my license anytime soon, (need it before January though), because first, I basically got lied too. I'm not getting a car, at all. Second, didn't start college this Fall so wasn't know need. Don't pity me, life goes on. Sucky, but life goes on. I'll HOPEFULLY be going to college next semester, January, and HOPEFULLY i'll have my license or atleast someone who can take me. No license, no car. Can't get a car with no license. Can't drive if you have a license with no car. So, lose lose situation haha. So that's how that goes

Oh! Do you know how bad it sucks to get a letter and a email from the college you want to go to but can't go to it because it's so far away and even if you did have a car it'd be alot of gas. It's 30-40 minutes away. It sucks. Absolutely sucks. So, I think I actually came to a conclusion like, a few days ago. I think ima just have to find something to do at RCC, basically the only thing I can really do at the moment. I'll look through their programs later and see if something interests me. Hopefully there will be something that sparks my interests. I can most likely go to PCC down the road, later, years later >.>. Dad said I could take what I need for the PCC program at RCC and then go to PCC for the main stuff, but that adds in like an extra year or two, and I don't want that, makes no sense to do it for four years, when I can do it in two. So yeah, my lifes story haha. I'll be looking at RCC's page later.

I have been looking.. for jobs, mainly so I will be able to save up for a car one day, and then I want to save up for a trip. I'll explain "the trip" in my next blog entry. The job search is going nowhere and is kinda boring. I also want a job so i can get out of being in the house all day haha. I need to get out, atleast sometimes!

I  have been...spending alot of time with Sarah  She is my step Mom, who I refer to as my Mom ^-^.
I just got her into watching Awkward with me! We started on season one episode one, cause we are just that cool ;D. I really like this show, and I am glad that she does too, or we wouldn't be watching it together and spending time together. I love her sooo much <3.

I also stayed with Nina the other week, we had
loads of fun! I seriously missed her
and Addison so much!
Ima see her this week<3

My.. step sister is going to New Jersey for maybe a month at the month. Austin was supppose to go with her, and their Dad but he changed his mind to stay at home with all of us. That's cool, i'm glad she's getting away. The only thing that really irks me, is that she had a going away party last night, and didn't even invite me let alone her brother or Mother! She complains about how Sarah doesnt' call her first or blah blah, when all this week Sarah has been trying to get in touch with her. Pisses Pees me offf. You are suppose to treat family better I though. But what do I know? I'ma leave this as is, for now.

Ima go guys! Hope your school year, or college, or non college, or life is going great!
I also put pink extensions in my hair woot!

Byeee<3

Like woah! June 6th.

Hai hai! Blah blah. Iunno what to write O.O. But this has to be done haha. Besides listening to Lancifer is really upbeat and motivating ^-^, really o.o, look him up o.o, better yet, there wil be a video at the end of this entry, WOOT!
The past week and a half I stayed with Nina, pretty fun. Not to shabby. Addison is getting bigger and bigger o.o, well most babies do now don't they? Hahaha. Blonde moment, my baddddddddddddd.
LIKE WOAHHH.

Oh! Allie and Bekah had written me while I was gone, so yay. I love having penpals hahah. Pretty fun. I like to write. Obviously. Bekah doesn't really write as much as Allie. But I suppose I don't mind.
A letter is a letter! WOOT.

Bleh bleh.
Oh my gawsh  guys! I keep changing what I want to do career wise. And I think I have finallllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy figured everything out. Do you wanna know?! Do you!?
Well. I love making Youtube videos, and editing them. So I figured I should do something in media, like iunno, that is what I have figured out so far! Of course with Photography and Business as well. Just adding onto my amazing list haha.

Still looking for somethingI am great at and I have yet to find it so. Eh.

Have an amazing weekend guys! Also, Emerald Point is calling my name Friday, woot!
Bye loves <3.

LANCIFER :D, clickkk.

December 11th 1:07am :D.

Hai hai hai hai! I haven't kept updating and it is making me mad cause I keep saying I willl xDD, I really do try o.o, no joke O.O. I will keep updating sooner or later o.o! Eventually o.o, mwahhaa o.o!

So, my Dad finally took me to the GED place! I start in January, I need to hurry and finally get this shit shiz over with already so I can do something GREAT with my life, seriously. So this woman said they have this photography program and I will probably do it. Then after probably something with business or something in the medical field.

LIFE IS TO SHORT TO ONLY DO ONE THING IN LIFE, right? Indeed I am, so woot woot.

Eh I don't really want to drive but I am going to get my license after my GED or during, ima take the classes. I just don't wann drive with all the fucking freakin' crazy people out there on the road O.O. So yeah o.o.

I will write more another day, kinda tired heh DX. I really will  update soon o.o. Just incase I forget..which I WON'T! Merry Christmas Everyone <3.

November 9th!

Hey there! I know it has been foreverrrrrrrrr, but I haven't really been home, blah blah blah right?

What have you missed? Eh not sure but maybe if you keep reading you will see haha. I know I'm mean, deal with it you awesome person :D!

I finally got the other side of my lip pierced ya know, angel bites, and then I got my bellybutton/naval re-done. The bellybutton hurt worse than my lip one, weird huh? Well, they look pretty darn sweettttt :D!

I've been at Angels for a week or two or three, haha, just haven't felt like going home. Eh. I miss Sarah and everything but it just gets sad/boring/depressing there and with my Dad acting like a butt and won't do anything for me(school wise) I don't see the point in staying there alot, mean I know but I mean c'mon! I seriously should have already had my G.E.D. by now and it is just ridiculous >.>. I'm just waiting for him to text me or call saying that he misses me but I doubt that will happen haha. I'm a sucky person afterall. ANYHOW, enough of that haha.

Sarah's birthday was yesterday! I wasn't there but still wished her a happy birthday. I know her birthday wasn't the best seeing as she had chemo that day, bummer eh? Overall though, from how she said her day was though seemed pretty good to me which is great because she deserves a great birthday even when she isn't feeling well. I love and miss you Sarah (: <3.

I got a tattoo, yep, like a week or two ago, forgot, anyhow it's the eye of horus, it kinda hurt seeing as it hit a little bit of a bone D: !

Babysitting! I have been doing that alot, or well been trying too! I gets money and get to hangout with Addison so it's pretty rad :D. I get to see Nina too so which is super duper awesome cause I love her sooo much :D <3.

Ima go but sorry for a short update, I will really try to post a new entry soon. Love you guys<3.

Tueday February 1st. In school,near afternoon.

"I found I could say things with color and shapes that I couldn't say any other way - things I had no words for."-Georgia O'Keeffe

Hey everyone. Yes the title above is quite right, xD. I'm in school, actually in my Apex class. They don't have my information to begin my classes or anything, since I am new to apex. So, someone last semester took and finished 6 classes on Apex, and I was like dannnggg. I need to do at least three, but doing four would help out just as well haha. I have second lunch, which sucks. Most of my friends have first lunch and I am stuck with the second once, of course. Oh well, I will deal. Have too, haha.
My new classes started today, you know, the Geometry and Art, that's the only classes I have been too, besides Apex which is now. I have Geometry with a really nice teacher(not the first time I have had her).Which sucks because I have tall people sitting in front of me.-__-. Note taking should be fun eh? After that, I ran off too Art. She seems cool, but she shows that she will get on your for misbehavior. Art should be fun, haven't took an art class since the 6th grade and that wasn't to bad. One of my bestest friends, Raaven, is in my Geometry and Art class :D. I'm glad me and her finally get a class, just sucks that I don't have lunch with her, BUMMER. So I am in my 3rd period class now, Apex, and there isn't alot of people in here. Kinda quiet. Teacher is nice, and kinda funny. xD. Well, wish me luck on my last class of the day, Physical Science. :o. Oh,hmm my lunch wasn't so bad(:
I was called to the office during 2nd, and I suppose that went well. ISS tomorrow...Yay? I don't know if that is really a yay or not. I will probably just draw the whole time in there, sleeping on desks are not easy, for me anyway. Not everyone that I skipped with will be in there, thank gawd. I didn't want everyone to be in there really, just cause. Cause I dunno? xD. I apparently do not know alot do I? But then again, I DO! Don't judge me, o.o.
I dunno what to write,hmmm. I talked to one of my old bestfriends(Eli) today, he hasn't been going to this school so it may be a rough day on him, but probably not. He is a pretty swell person, yepp. (:
I know going to new schools aren't the easiest of things, sometimes hard, really just depends on that person. I went to a different school half a year then came back to the one I had original been going too. That is just a whole different story. So yeah, if anyone you know is new to your school, don't be so hard on them. Hehe.
Victoria said my blog was sometimes funny! O.O. That kinda made me happy :D.
I dunno if it is sometimes funny or not, but I would like for it to be interesting. I am a very weird and strange person so.
20 something minutes before next period, GAHH. I hope she is nice, she better be. MWAHAHAHAHAHAAHA. O.O, I got type happy, hehe.
So I think I have written enough, blah blah. Hope everyones week is pretty awesome.
Bye for now.

Also, I did add a quote<3.